The Makings of Meanigful Relationships

As I overheard the conversation between a mother and daughter, the daughter (apparently in her early twenties) pleadingly explained to her mother her apparent lack of good friends within her life. Her mother’s rebuttal was shaped in the fact that her daughter was still young, and that God would send the appropriate relationships within her life at the suitable season. She went on to explain that when she was in her twenties she did not have friends, per say, but God had established older Christian women in her life who helped her build inner godly foundation.

Such a conversation got my wheels spinning, and I began to fully understand my situational “friend drought” as well. As I reminisced on past relationships, both platonic and romantic, I realized that I came into many of those unions broken. I was not fully aware of my inner self, or the plan God had destined for my life’s journey; therefore, I was looking for that in those relationships. This made me quite needy. However, the enemy skewed my perception of my neediness; having me believe that I was the one helping "hopeless cases". Even if they had been the ones in need, I too was searching for something within them that I could only successfully find in an intimate relationship with my Creator.

We must return to the Manufacturer of our product (self) and ask Him for the components that will efficiently and effectively help us work. There is a time and season for everything; thus, there is a time for companionship and fellowship, and there is a time for alone personal critique and evaluation. The world pumps false neediness for relationships into our psyches daily; this is why the phenomenon of relationship hoping is quite rampant within pop culture. However, this constant preoccupation with the needs of others never lets the individual commune with inner thoughts, or grow in ways that God requires us to mature.

Moreover, the number of friend roll-calls, follower logs, or hearts next to our “relationship status” updates, should not be the approval point from which we build lasting relationships. These are false indicators. However, once God molds the inner you into a person capable of being friendly and/or romantic (healthily), then meaningful relationships will surface; seemingly from nowhere. Remember, you receive what you put out; so desperate searches for human relationships only makes you vulnerably receptive to desperate people.

Wait on God and be patient. I promise He’ll make it worth your wild!

Graciously Signing Off,

Nikki D

Power Scripture: “A man that hath friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” Proverbs 18:24

Song Anyone?

Ever notice how when you are down in the dumps and feeling out of place in your world that the right song has the power to make things all better? The healing qualities of music are so profound that even the melodies themselves have the capability of “curing” aliments of the heart. As I sat today in the bookstore feeling sad and awkward, I thought to look up some of the psalms (songs) in the Bible. David was the ultimate psalmist of his time, and many of the words he wrote were similar to the feelings that I go through currently. There are times when you just hate (for lack of a better word) your life and the things that are taking place in it, but you know in the pit of your very being that God has your best intentions at heart.

However, as Christians sometimes it’s hard to admit that we are having an “off” day because people assume that we are always enthusiastic and “on” for God. There are those times; however, when you just feel down; those times when your thinking skates on the brink of schizophrenia. And for any Christians out there who claim to never have off days because they are now kids of the King are liars (yes, LIARS are what I called them)! I am human, and I am daily accepting my humanness. It sounds ridiculous, but when you’ve been raised in the church and religion was pumped into your psyche twenty-four-seven, it’s sometimes difficult to separate your spiritual from your physical self.

This struggle between earthen vessel and holy internal gift is overwhelming at times, but I know that with God’s continued help I will win the battle every time. In the meantime, and in between time I’ll just put my earphones in my ears, blast the latest fave of my tunes, and belt out (in my Whitney Houston voice lol) the lyrics. Anyone else wanna join me? Let’s just have a jam session that mends the soul… Song anyone?

And IIIIII will always love yooooou!

Nikki

(Hey forward me some feel good songs that help get you through the day! Thanks guys.)

My Playlist Lineup (As of today)

Green Light John Legend
Run ‘Til I’m Finished Smokie Norfold
Doo Wop Lauren Hill
The Garden Marvin Sapp
Happy Being Me Angie Stone
PYT Michael Jackson (Michael was bad ya’ll!)
Under My Skin Frank Sinatra

Because God Said So!

In a world where there are so many skeptics and critics on every possible subject, it becomes necessary for Christians to arm ourselves with the answer to the inevitable “whys” that will surface from outsiders who wish to know the reasoning for our actions. And what is the answer to the constant sideways looks and the “why does she speak that way or act that way”? Because God said so; that’s it! This is the only answer necessary for those enemies that rear their ugly heads in the many situations of life. Therefore, when those gossiping and trifling co-workers (family members, Facebook friends etc.) roll their eyes with the she-thinks-she’s better-than-us stare, or boldly ask why you don’t ever join in on their foolish conversations, your answer should be because God said so.

No comprende on their end? It’s easy to point out what God says in the scriptures. So if they want to get indignant, flip through your Bible or, hey if you’re like me, type in the words of the scripture into the Google search box and the results of the exact scripture pop right up. Furthermore, be not discouraged that you are no well researched Theologian because God gave us the knowledge of technology so that we could better reference His word. (Bet, you never heard that reasoning!) So when you decide to remain by yourself instead of engaging in gossip (Ephesians 4:29), you turn down that date with Mr. I-Don’t Think- So (2 Cor. 6:14), or you refuse to be discouraged by the depressing things of this world (Philippians 4:8), just know the reason why these are the actions that you choose to display is because God said so.

Put that devil in his place when he gets beside himself and I promise because of your resistance, he has to flee (James 4:7)! The Word works; just see for yourself. Test out the above parenthetical scriptures on the enemies in your life and you’ll realize that the answer to your problem(s) is always present in God’s word! Be blessed good people.

Signing Out!

Nikki D

The Vine: Cutting vs Pruning

When observing a gardener at work you will notice that there are certain parts of a plant that must be completely cut off and those that are merely pruned back in order to guarantee the survival of the entire plant. However, there is a difference between cutting and pruning. When pruning, only the dead portions of a particular section are cleaned away, while the other remains for further nutrients from the plant. Jesus uses the exact metaphor when explaining the importance of abiding in the Father through him. To abide literally means to accept or submit; to remain faithful to. This is what God requires of his children, regardless of the stage that we presently find ourselves in. We must be willing to be pruned in order to remain connected to the life source.

Jesus clearly states in John 15: 1- 4 that:

1I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. 3You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. 4Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. (NIV)

He explains to the reader that all fruit originates because of its connection to the vine. Be not deceived in thinking that anything that is good comes from any other source but “The Vine”(James 1:16-17). Therefore, on your journey towards success you must remain aware of your connection to “The Vine” because this is from where the constant source of nutrients (inspiration, knowledge, understanding etc) must flow in order for fruit to be produced. Nothing good happens without God, so stop following the world’s standard of referring to oneself as self-made--- there is no such thing! You were created from the earth in the image of God and regardless of what you believe this is FACT.

Moreover, the only way for you to be fruitful in a world where branches connected to alternative hosts are daily being plucked up and consumed by the furnace, is to remain connected to the Lord of Hosts! He is the ONLY WAY providing longevity in a world where people are on top one day and down the following. Furthermore, any branch (person) who attempts to initiate a temporary attachment to “The Vine” will be stripped as well. Because attaching a branch to a life source with tape (hanging on to God only when it’s convenient) can in no way be compared to those branches which have been grafted to “The Vine” permanently.

Make your choice today. Are you attached to “The Vine” for the long haul or are you willing to be fruitless in life only to be later thrown in the furnace at the end?