Opposites DO NOT Attract

“Opposites attract.” This commonly quoted phrase is in actuality a skewed perception of reality. Opposites do not attract; and in fact, “you ARE the company that you keep.” So, many of us have bought into this fantasy when it comes to dating or locating a “soul mate”. Many claim to be searching for someone to complete them; fill in those empty spaces where they lack perfection. Thus, it can be quite deceiving when we find someone that picks up our slack. At first glance, it could seem as if they really are the polar opposite of who we are.

Take a quick trip down memory lane and think about all of your failed relationship attempts. What was the ultimate reason(s) for you two parting ways? When I think about my past, words that come to mind describing those people are, insecure, controlling, needy, clingy, etc. These were the things that got under my skin when it came to my relationships with those individuals. However, with further self-evaluation, I realized that these traits which annoyed me, were actually who I was at that time. Such a discovery, made it impossible for me to point the blame solely on them for our relationship meltdowns.

Then I wondered what the Word had to say about such a phenomenon. The scripture that came to me was “light does not comprehend darkness (John 1:5).” Therefore, if you find yourself with someone who lacks in areas where you feel yourself stronger, most likely you have some of those same issues and insecurities within. Moreover, when you constantly attract the same type of personality in your dating life (see “Same person different face”), it may be time for a self evaluation to figure out what signals you are giving off to attract such persons.

We can only be children of light or darkness; and your spirit will attract those similar to you. When the Holy Spirit lives within your heart you expel light to the world which cannot be extinguished. Now, there will be instances when darkness will be attracted to your light (think fly zapper); however, if they are not looking for you to lead them to light, they will be left zapped. Therefore, know who you are people, and the best way to find that out is to look at your company. Show me your relationships (friends, significant others, associates, etc.) and I’ll show you who you are.

Be Blessed

Nikki D